remember our lovely story? oh dear, why must you run from me? please, oh please, i miss our conversations that lasted until the next day. oh dear, my darling, why did you leave?
-
that was a direct line from the last book I'll ever write.
Enough said.
Okay, most of you know that the first book I wrote was Chaos and Conflict, right? Well...
ah. The story revolved around Vienna Amaraylis and Roxas Reynadli.
...pssh. I'm changing Roxas's name. O_o
Yep. I don't want Squeenix wanting to kill me over it. It's either I change his name or Sora's. If I do change Roxas's it's gonna be Zane! Do you not realize how hard it is finding names that go lovely with Vienna? Bah, the downsides of using an original and awesome name. I totally hate my writing at the moment. It's all crappy and full of shitake. I want to throw my laptop off the Empire State building, yet I don't. My writing is what defines me. That's the sad part. I don't know who I am.
For now, that is. Soon, I'll begin complaining about how I just want to lose myself in the crowd. The contradictions of life!
Anyways, Zane or Roxas? Sora or Joel? Joel...Monique...mm. That sounds lovely.
xD *is zoney lately*
Currently, The Killers are my writing muse. They are amazing. Have you been on my twitter? You should visit it and follow me.
www.twitter.com/viennaroxanne.
You just should. For the sake of the world and of knowing where in the world I am. I feel myself fading ever so slowly. As if Life and Karma were working against me.
Oh, and this is something random that I decided to show the few people that actually read my blog:
"Dear Vienna,
Hello. It's been a while? Maybe? I can't really see the line between time and being. Everything is blurry. So very...blurry. As if the night was missing her stars. As if Monique fought with Nikki. As if you left me.
Wait. You did leave me.
I'm glad you did. Who knows what mess you would be in if you had stayed."
I look at the piece of paper, stained with what I hoped was water.
He had sent me this letter before the day he slipped into a coma.
What the heck was his problem? No 'I love you'? It was ridiculous how I was still pining over the boy that had left me out in the rain so many years ago.
Idiot.
-x-
This is...ah, the prologue of The Final Stage. The last book I will ever write. I need to stop thinking of amazing ideas. I want Stage to be what I will be remembered for. The Final Stage goes through Zane/Roxas's proposal to Vi, and all the crap that happens before they make it down the aisle. That is, if they do make it. I'm not sure if they'll end up together. That would suck immensely.
Something I think is hilariously pathetic? Me. I'm bending my back trying to please everybody. I'm sick of it. I wish I was my best friend. I wish I had a best friend like me. Who would wait for you. Every. Freaking. Day. I'm sick of how people throw me away. It's...sad. Depressing. Bullcrap. I mean, after, what? Three years? Going on four-of friendship. Find some better friends and bam. You're done. Average fourteen-sixteen year old girls care only about five things: boys, gossip, phones, getting better and higher friends, and making a new name for themselves.
I'm not saying that we're all average here. I'm just bitter.
When did my life go so...wrong?
-Angie
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